i would get dressed, and i would go to work. and then when i got home, i would get in my pajamas, and i would lay on the couch, and i would just wait. "i'm done. please, just let me go." i look back on that, and it's-- it makes me so sad. [dramatic music] ♪ >> oh, it's absolutely terrifying because you're no longer the person that you used to be. you're starting to become this person that's terrified of everything. i couldn't leave my home, and i would go into panic and have anxiety at work. i would quit my jobs because i was embarrassed. i was afraid that someone would find out that, you know, i'm hiding behind the filing cabinet having an anxiety attack, and i didn't want everybody to think i was crazy, 'cause that's what you think you're doing: you're going crazy. >> as i was going through life and everything like that, "boom, boom, boom, boom,"